Dear Mommy-

I am starving. I really do need more than three meals of pig pellet food per day. I know that you supplement my pellets with fresh fruit and veggies (which I really appreciate) however I think you should grant me access to the refrigerator while you are at work. I am a growing girl and need the extra energy. Please consider my request. I love you and you would be the best mommy in the world if you grant me this request.

Love,

Lola ^_^

P.S.- I really do not like the childproof locks you placed on the kitchen cabinets. The new locks have made it very difficult for me to open the cabinets and drag out all of the Tupperware that I enjoy chewing on.

P.S.S.- Can you change the water in my swimming pool? It’s a bit warm and murky. It’s really hot out too.