Dear Mommy-
I am not trying to brag but I’ve recently discovered I may be the smartest pig in the world (a rather narcissistic comment I know, however, I really feel this may indeed be true). Silly mommy! While you did remember to shut the baby/pet gate at the bottom of the stairs this morning you forgot to latch/lock it! With my sharp wit and prodigious skills, I managed to open the gate with my teeth, dash upstairs, eat Izzie’s dog food, and poop on the floor while you were getting ready for work. I apologize for the bathroom accident; however, you do not have a litter box for me upstairs so in reality my actions were somewhat justifiable given the circumstances. I’d like to suggest you invest in an upstairs litter box so that in the event I pull future Houdini acts, I will not be forced to defecate once again on the carpet.
Yours,
Lola ^_^
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