The Chronicles of Charlie

Dear diary- I came face to face with The Authority this weekend. The Authority is a vicious, shiny black, roaring monster. It has a very long tail and ferociously sucks up everything in its path. My family kept touching it and I believe it was in an effort to calm the angered beast. It quickly became apparent that The Authority was winning this battle- for it pulled them along to each room in the house. In an attempt to save my family from its murderous grip, I began barking and biting at it. At first this seemed to do little, however, after snapping at it (as it led me around the house) it eventually went silent. I think I killed it. Sincerely, Charlie