Insurmountable

Sometimes unexpected gifts come into one's life inexplicably. Sometimes those gifts inter insurmountable obstacles. Recently this has occurred to me. Which brings me to this- can a person predict the future or does God? If something appears to be too hard down the road, is it easier to simply walk away? What is the universe trying to teach me? Is the lesson that one must end something based upon barriers they predict so that things don't get complicated?  Are we playing God when we do this? Or perhaps the lesson is to end it and there is an unknown gift in letting go that has not yet been revealed.

These are the questions that haunt me. I am a guarded and cautious person by nature. Walking away is my survival mechanism. Perhaps God wants me to grow in this area and throw caution to the wind and chance it. I am tempted to do just that. The connection is unexplainable. Naturally the other person may want to play it safe and walk away which then leads to no choice on my end. What I do know is that I must put these words on paper or they will rob me of my serenity. Can I be in a committed relationship with no obligations? I don't know because I've never done this before. My faithful intuition is telling me nothing (which is baffeling). The true question is do I have enough faith to try? To let go and know God's got this and I only need faith. There are two choices: walk away because it may be hard or leap in knowing God's got it.  At this point I can only do one of two things: surrender and walk away or surrender to each other knowing either way we cannot play God.

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference."

Just for today. After all all we have is today. We can only live in the present moment. Dear God show me the next step while knowing I can't see the whole staircase.