Hope will Rise

We've been here before. This certainly isn't the first time our country and its people have found themselves on the wrong side of history. In fact, many of us will fail to recognize the full impact until the lenses of hindsight appear. For those who possess the clarity to see past the smoke and mirrors there is already a movement underway. Do not underestimate the power of unity, the power of hope. We are a nation which fought long and hard for the abolition of slavery. We fought for desegregation, civil rights, marriage equality, and more. Those who wish to oppress their citizens underestimate the basic human goodness in others. We are our brothers keepers. We will continue to fight racism, sexism, bigotry, and hate. Have we taken a tremendous slide backwards? Without question, yes. And still hope lives and binds. This is not a death sentence. Rather it is an urgent call to push back against those who wish to silence us. The denial of climate change alone is reason enough to stand strong together. Our very existence on this planet depends upon it.  Our progress over the last eight years has been threatened to its very core. And still I believe hope will rise. Fundamentally we are a nation which consist of many who will fight against injustice and inequality. Where there is hope there is always a way. May we band together to save not just ourselves but humanity itself. 

The Pendelum

She seeks balance. It's in her nature. A true libra through in through. She has known great happiness as well as great pain. She seeks and craves solid ground. She is a pendulum which at times rocks back and forth trying to regain balance. She has fought long and hard to let go of past hurts. At times she will crave independence and at other times need her hand held like a small bewildered child. Her past has taught her that people you love often leave. In the past this left her with one foot continuously out the door. She has since learned this way is no way to live. Acceptance is her mantra today. She has learned to love fiercely even as a small part of her will always fear abandonment. Despite this, she has learned to love more fiercely even if it means her heart may later be broken. Once guarded she now lives and loves openly. She may be complicated but she is worth it. Those who do not embrace the beautiful mess she is are now quietly let go. She has slayed her dragons. She no longer carries the weight of ghost from her past. Love her fiercely back. Her intentions are never meant to hurt or harm others. She is strong and it takes a person equally as strong to understand her. Today her pendulum is balanced. 

It's in the little things...

It's in the way he looks at me. Its in the ways he runs his fingers through my hair. It's in the way he looks into my eyes. It's in the way he touches me-setting my skin on fire. It's in the way he speaks and tells stories. It's in the way he whispers sweet words during our most intimate moments. It's in the way he travels just to see me. It's in the way he expresses himself. It's in the way he writes me beautiful love letters. It's in the way we enjoy blanket picnics together. It's in the ways we connect. It's in the way in which he makes me laugh. It's in the way he is considerate and thoughtful in all things. It's in the way he lets me run my fingers through his irresistible hair. It's in the ways in which he loves me. It's in so many ways that it would take pages to try and capture all the ways I love him. It's in all ways I'm grateful to be in his life today.

Religion vs Spirtuality

"Religion is man made. Spirtuality is God given."

-Source Uknown

I grew up Catholic. As a young child this meant attending church each Sunday and later meant attending Catholic schools. It was what my family was and a label which I wore proudly. I loved the ritualism in mass and took comfort in much loved traditions. Having been raised by an exceptionally spiritual mother (and consequently my maternal side of the family) I began to later question religion. This became more pronounced throughout the years (much to the chagrin of my teachers-particularly those who taught our required Religion courses). In short I (as respectively as possible) became argumentative in these types of classes. I became increasingly frustrated by a faith which provided me with few answers. To further compound the problem I began reading material which would horrify even the most liberal of priests. I struggled and couldn't understand why I couldn't swallow the explanations my peers so readily accepted. Some of my readings focused on politics-primarily that books in the Bible were chosen as result of politics (to unite an empire under one centralized religion) versus divine inspiration. I was indignant that books that spoke of reincarnation were carefully (and silently) discarded at the Council of Nicea.. It seemed ludarcris to me that no one seemed to even question Jesus whereabouts from roughly the age of eighteen to his thirties (note: I think scholars knew exactly where he'd been but the explanation did not tie in neatly to their carefully constructed story). Alas, I am not here to debate the Bible. My aim is not to sway others from their long held and beloved beliefs. Rather, I propose that all paths lead to God regardless of the road one chooses to take. Nothing has reaffirmed my belief in this more than AA. Here millions of people found a power greater than themselves with which to live by. A power which literally saved them in ways nothing else could. In the rooms of AA no one would infringe upon another's right to believe in whatever might save another person from the true hells of alcoholism. Despite years of Catholic ideaology as well as books devoted to questioning religion, I was unable to get sober. Through AA I have discovered a power greater than myself which helps keep me sober. As it would turn out I would find God not through books or childhood teachings but within the walls of AA. I thank God for this everyday.