"You Oughta Know"

'cause the joke that you laid on the bed that was me
 And I'm not gonna fade
 As soon as you close your eyes and you know it
 And every time I scratch my nails down someone else's back
 I hope you feel it...well can you feel it
-Alanis Morissette "You Oughta Know"

Contradiction:
1. Something illogical: something that has aspects that are illogical or inconsistent with each other.
2. Opposing statement: a statement, or the making of a statement, that opposes or disagrees with somebody 
    or something.

I have long been baffled by people whom I perceive to be walking contradictions.  I feel certain we have all experienced this at one time or another- dealing with the type of person who professes one thing but whose actions contradict the very thing in which they are professing.  At present, I find myself in this very situation.  When the line between true and false is as blurred as it is in this instance it is difficult to siphon away the lies in order to see the truth. 

(Disclaimer: the following are not verbatim statements, are in no particular order, and are anonymous contradictions which may or may not be based upon actual events.  Any identification with the following statements/contradictions does not mean this author is referring to you.  If you feel your pride or maturity is at risk, please take caution and discontinue reading.  Reader discretion is advised.)

What he said: I love your writing- it's open and honest.  It's personal and really speaks to people. 
What he meant: You overshare in your blogs.  You reveal too much about yourself.  You use your blogs to manipulate others.  You need a co-author to review and approve of your blogs.

What he said: I don't want to date other people.  I don't want to share you with anyone else.  I love you.  I want you to cut your ex spouse out of your life (as well as your child's life).  I want you to be mine and mine only.
What he meant: Our relationship was never a big deal.  Although I didn't want to share you, I had no problem intimately sharing myself with others.  I'm not sure why you're mad- we had already broken up before you found out I was sleeping with my ex while you and I were together.

I could go on ad nauseum but it's pointless to become fixated on details from the past.  The important thing is to recognize a situation for what it is and to take away whatever lessons you can gain from the situation.  In hindsight, I recognize the blazing red flags (jealousy, control, and manipulation) that were frantically waving at me in vain- (alas, I failed to heed their warnings and run).  And yet...I find myself grateful for the "crash course" reminder in dating.  I realize that I needed to be reminded of what behaviors I find acceptable and those which I refuse to tolerate. 

Lastly,
To those whom think I should censor what I write---writing is who I am.  It is my constitutional right to have the freedom to express myself.  Writing is and alway will be an expression of who I am.  This particular blog has been in existence since 2006.  It has chronicled my life through the ups as well as the downs.  While each person is entitled to their own opinion, if my writing agitates a reader then it is his or her right to stop reading it.  I would no more try to direct an artist on how to paint a picture than I would try to tell an author what he or she should be writing about.