Independence or the lack thereof...

Independence versus dependence- a paradoxical and delicate balancing act for one such as myself.  Given too much independence I become an island in and of itself prohibiting all would be tourists.  Given too much dependence I promptly morph into a cagey cornered animal desperately seeking escape at all cost.  Without question an over abundance of either compromises many aspects of my life-particularly with regard to friendships and intimate relationships.  Perhaps no one understands these traits (or demons if you prefer) I battle against better than Matt.  Matt and I were married for nearly five years before we divorced in early 2011 (I assume all responsibility in this matter not because I'm a martyr but rather because it's factual).  After seeking some much needed personal help for myself, Matt and I began dating in December 2011 (already you can clearly begin to see a pattern in my indecisive thought patterns and behaviors-I am a true Libra indeed).  Approximately five days ago Matt ended our relationship, however, deep love and friendship remains.  As a result of his painful decision, my respect for Matt has grown exponentially- he alone had the insight and courage to allow each of us the opportunity to seek out and explore our authentic selves.  While both of us acknowledge and accept we need more than the other is capable of providing, this was by no means an easy realization to come to.  It seems odd that two people who love each other so deeply and are willing to do anything to make it work cannot (in this situation) do so successfully.  In essence, we are two very different people with very, very different needs.  Compromise of self of either party would not only be unfair but would also slowly destroy the love we have for each other.  The dissolution of our relationship is not to be misinterpreted in that we are seeking out other potential partners- rather it's a time in which we are both determined to work on ourselves...to simply jump into another relationship would be foolish if not downright dangerous for our own personal growth and development.  Matt and I have both reached that pivotal moment in which we are seeking knowledge of ourselves with the same desperation of a man searching for water in a desert. As for the future- who knows?  What I do know to be true is that my love for Matt cannot be affected by time, location, or destination---it will forever know no bounds.